Some people will try to put you down. Some people will try to make this feel like it is your own fault.

Nobody lives your life for you. Nobody feels what it is like to be in your skin. FUCK all of them.

You feel guilty for what you did in the past? Maybe the present shows it to you what this is all about.

FUCK YOU. FUCK YOUR OPINIONS. FUCK YOU AND ALL OF YOU THINK IS TRUE. YOU KNOW NOTHING ABOUT WHAT THIS IS LIKE. If you think this is is your fault, this is your problem. I know God loves me. i know I am not guilty. And I know I have always told how much I loved. I told everyone. I might have not told you. I am sorry for that. I should have. I do love you, almost more than anything on Earth. I just cannot do this anymore. I cannot tell you my nightmares anymore. I gotta find more support, otherwise I will crash once and forever.

God is the only one who really knows everything. And He is the only one who can change things for me.

Perhaps it is time to bring the old times back. Just a little different, because I am the woman I am now.

I will never walk out on you. Never. Because I love too much. You will never read this and it is OK. I don't need you to read or know this. You would never understand it.

Just know in your heart that I love you and that this is unconditional. Like it is for everyone else. After all, I know I will eventually die. Of loving too much. And not being able to wait for you to realize that. But I swear the wounds you cause will always heal faster than they can hurt.